Thursday, January 26, 2023

When You're Over Seventy...

I was standing at the bar one night minding my own business.

This fat ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said,

"You're kinda cute.  You gotta phone number?"

I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?  She said,  "Yeah, I got a pen".

I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you."

Cost me 6 stitches...but,

When you're over seventy............who cares?


I went to the drug store and told the clerk "Give me 3 packets of

condoms, please."

Lady Clerk:  "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?"

I said "Nah... She's purty good lookin'....."

When you're over seventy............who cares?


I was talking to a young woman in the VFW last night.  She said, "If

you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look


I said, if I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there

instead of you.

Cost me a fat lip, but...  When you're over seventy............who cares?


I was telling a woman in the Club about my ability to guess what day a

woman was born just by feeling her breasts.

"Really," she said, "Go on then.. try."

After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and

said,  "Come on, what day was I born?

I said, "Yesterday."

Cost me a kick in the nuts, but...  When you're over

seventy............who cares?



h/t to JB


  1. Ask a woman if you could get her advice. When she says "yes", ask her if a dwarf says her hair smells nice, is it sexual harassment?

  2. Seriously? I'm supposed to wait Two Whole Years to use those?

  3. Great Jokes!!! I laffed in my coffee!!!!

  4. Replies
    1. Old people with a bad name have worked hard to earn that bad name. Respect the effort.

  5. What a great way to start a day. Those were awesome Irish.

  6. Happy 76 to me today... now, if I can just find the car keys to look for those women...

  7. True Story. Quite a few years ago I was with a buddy in some meet market and he asked some chick to dance. She said, "No!". Friend said, "What? Are you fussy about who you dance with?" She: "Yes" Buddy: "I'm not or I wouldn't have asked you."

  8. Thanks for the chuckle sez 1st ANGLICO

  9. LoL The truth is NOBODY over 70 is risking ANYTHING in this nation. The same twats responsible for getting us to this point "got theirs" already and are just hoping to run out the clock. If the entire boomer generation weren't greedy cowards the reckoning would've begun by now. "when you're over 70" my ass.

    1. LOL no-- We risked keeping brats like you around when we should'a kicked your ass to the curb.

    2. You will not know, until you get there. No coward here, faced down my share of your generation. Never lost.
      Bear in Indy

  10. Gtfo here. Live that long and you’ll find out!

  11. Getting closer to using those every day. Best part about them is always the comments.


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