That first one was literally me as a kid. Threw me across the kitchen, and we used the knife with the chunk out of the edge at every meal. It was kind of a booby prize to get your place set with that knife... ah, good times.
My mother still has (and uses) a set of sewing scissors with a scorch mark around a pinhole in the blade where I stuck it into a wall socket. I'm in my 50s now, so this was probably 50+ years ago. I will fight my siblings for those when she's gone, means more to me than most of the other stuff. Besides, good scissors are hard to find these days...
One of my sisters, when we were all just tykes, noticed that one of the bulbs on the Christmas tree wasn't lit. She unscrewed the bulb and stuck her finger in the socket thinking it needed to be cleaned.
Well, Katie Hobbs answers to Sotero, not to Americans, and certainly not to Arizonans. She mindlessly does his bidding, and she is his soul-less, loyal b!tch.
First one was me with a necklace. Mom heard it and I was coming to from across the room when she got there. Still have the scar (really faint) from the chain being burned into my palm.
The last meme... if a photo had a smell. I grew up in a small Kommiecticut town of dairy farms. My dead end road was surrounded on three sides by a large one that had a couple of hundred head and grew their own corn for silage. The cornfields are where they spread the manure for fertilizer. I personally never found the smell offensive because I grew up with it. It always reminded me of home. As the dairy farms slowly disappeared the land was bought and the corn crop replaced by McMansions. Those new residents constantly bitched about the smell. They were basically told to shut the fuck up and deal with it.
A few years ago, a man who owned property in Atlanta (I think it was in Vinings) tried to get his land rezoned from agricultural to single-family homes. All of his neighbors fought it and the planning commission rejected his rezoning request... so he turned it into a farm with cows and goats and chickens. When his neighbors tried to get the county to have the animals removed, they pointed out that the property was zoned agricultural and that they couldn't do anything about it....
Don't tailgate and honk the horn at an old farmer on tractor hauling cow manure in your white BMW. Chief of police wrote the ticket for littering, I think it was $50. He wrote the BMW driver a ticket for tailgating that was at least double. Who knows how much it cost to get the cow stink of the car.
When I was very young, I wanted to hide a dime. Found a great spot underneath a bulb in a table lamp. It was very interesting when Mom turned the lamp on. Made a mess of the dime though.
That first one makes me laugh. My oldest brother before I was born stuck a penny in one. Somehow got shocked and would walk way around it and say, "Bite you, Bite you" according to my Mom and Dad.
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That first one was literally me as a kid. Threw me across the kitchen, and we used the knife with the chunk out of the edge at every meal. It was kind of a booby prize to get your place set with that knife... ah, good times.
ReplyDeleten
My mother still has (and uses) a set of sewing scissors with a scorch mark around a pinhole in the blade where I stuck it into a wall socket. I'm in my 50s now, so this was probably 50+ years ago. I will fight my siblings for those when she's gone, means more to me than most of the other stuff. Besides, good scissors are hard to find these days...
DeleteOne of my sisters, when we were all just tykes, noticed that one of the bulbs on the Christmas tree wasn't lit. She unscrewed the bulb and stuck her finger in the socket thinking it needed to be cleaned.
ReplyDeleteNeedless to say she never did that again.
Nemo
Pic #1, a fork is a better tool for that. Ask me how I know? Still not in speaking term with my brother.
ReplyDeleteWell, Katie Hobbs answers to Sotero, not to Americans, and certainly not to Arizonans. She mindlessly does his bidding, and she is his soul-less, loyal b!tch.
ReplyDeleteMemes are the REAL news. The "news" is theater...at best.
ReplyDeleteWell said. This page and ninetymilesfromtyranny are leading the pack for sure.
DeleteFirst one was me with a necklace. Mom heard it and I was coming to from across the room when she got there. Still have the scar (really faint) from the chain being burned into my palm.
ReplyDeleteMidwest Chick
The last meme... if a photo had a smell. I grew up in a small Kommiecticut town of dairy farms. My dead end road was surrounded on three sides by a large one that had a couple of hundred head and grew their own corn for silage. The cornfields are where they spread the manure for fertilizer. I personally never found the smell offensive because I grew up with it. It always reminded me of home. As the dairy farms slowly disappeared the land was bought and the corn crop replaced by McMansions. Those new residents constantly bitched about the smell. They were basically told to shut the fuck up and deal with it.
ReplyDeleteA few years ago, a man who owned property in Atlanta (I think it was in Vinings) tried to get his land rezoned from agricultural to single-family homes. All of his neighbors fought it and the planning commission rejected his rezoning request... so he turned it into a farm with cows and goats and chickens. When his neighbors tried to get the county to have the animals removed, they pointed out that the property was zoned agricultural and that they couldn't do anything about it....
DeleteDon't tailgate and honk the horn at an old farmer on tractor hauling cow manure in your white BMW. Chief of police wrote the ticket for littering, I think it was $50. He wrote the BMW driver a ticket for tailgating that was at least double. Who knows how much it cost to get the cow stink of the car.
DeleteWhen I was very young, I wanted to hide a dime. Found a great spot underneath a bulb in a table lamp. It was very interesting when Mom turned the lamp on. Made a mess of the dime though.
ReplyDeleteLOL: " I think I may have voted for a realtor."
ReplyDeleteCan't do any worse than a dem or RINO.
That Irish is one
Deletememe mutha......
Shut-yor-mouth!
I'm talkin' bout Irish!
-lg
That first one makes me laugh. My oldest brother before I was born stuck a penny in one. Somehow got shocked and would walk way around it and say, "Bite you, Bite you" according to my Mom and Dad.
ReplyDeleteBear Claw