These are stories that just seem likely to have originated
from someone over 50!!!!
This asshole looked at my beer belly last night and
sarcastically said, "Is
that Corona or Bud?"
I said, "There's a tap underneath; taste it and find out."
***********
I was talking to a girl in the bar last night.
She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got
your hair cut, you'd look all right."
I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over
there instead of you."
***********
I was telling a girl in the pub about my ability to guess
what day a woman was born just by feeling her boobs.
"Really" she said, "Go on then...try."
After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose
patience and said.
"Come on, what day was I born"?
I said, "Yesterday."
***********
I got caught taking a pee in the local swimming pool today.
The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.
***********
I went to the pub last night and saw a fat chick dancing on
a table.
I said, "Nice legs."
The girl giggled and said with a smile, "Do you really
think so."
I said "Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by
now. "
Those were great!. Thanks Dude.
ReplyDeleteLOL! Thanks for that!
ReplyDeleteHeh. You are *so* going to Hell for that. Even with a Pope with that "new Pope" smell ...h
ReplyDeleteExcellent!
ReplyDeleteyou are still the man! Is it true god invented whiskey to prevent you from conquering the world?
ReplyDelete