He's Not Wrong....

 

Steve Mudflap McGrew’s REMASCULATE podcast

@REMASCULATE

Have you noticed how the United States is starting to look like a bus station at 2 a.m.? It’s like we’re all just one missed Greyhound away from being found face down on a plastic bench with a bag of Funyuns as a pillow. People don’t care anymore—about how they look, about how they act, about basic hygiene. We’re all just one pajama-wearing Walmart trip away from complete societal collapse.

 

Remember when people used to put in the effort to look good? You look at old photos of people in public from, like, the 1950s, and everyone’s dressed like they’re on their way to a job interview at NASA. The men are in suits, hats tilted just right, like they're about to solve a mystery on a train. The women have their hair perfectly styled, lipstick on, clutching a purse like it contains the nation’s secrets. And that’s just to go grocery shopping!

 

Now? Oh, now we’re out here looking like we’re in the middle of a hostage negotiation with our closet. People are showing up to the airport in Crocs and pajama pants, like they’re expecting a four-hour delay at the gate and maybe an emotional support hamster to get them through it. You see a guy at the DMV wearing a tank top that says “I paused my game to be here,” and you’re like, “Yeah, I bet you did, buddy. I bet you did.”

 

It’s like nobody even knows what a mirror is anymore. You’ve got folks out here with hair that looks like it’s been styled by a leaf blower. And don’t get me started on the people wearing sunglasses indoors at night. What are you hiding from? The fluorescent lighting? Reality?

 

Let’s be honest, we’re all living in the ‘People of Walmart’ slideshow now. And it’s not just how we look; it’s how we act! People used to say “good morning” or at least grunt in your general direction. Now, you get on a bus, and it’s a collection of feral stares and people making TikToks like it’s a confessional booth at a dive bar.

 

It’s like the collective standard of public decorum has fallen so far that if you’re just wearing clothes that aren’t stained, you’re practically a Rockefeller. There used to be a time when people took pride in their appearance, where leaving the house in sweatpants was a cry for help, not a fashion statement. Now, wearing jeans is considered “dressed up.”

 

The United States in 2024: where the dress code is “Please just have something on,” and the only rule is “No shirt, no shoes, no problem.” We’re all just one Netflix binge away from showing up to work in a bathrobe and calling it “business casual.”