Saturday, June 18, 2011
I Don't Have any Contracting Work Right Now...BUT...
I would hire her anyway..........................
Friday, June 17, 2011
Proper Truck Badging........
I finally got around to adding this to my truck.....now I feel that it is complete .....
Newlyweds......
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said,"You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, ly pop...but at the bar...you know...they have frozen glasses..."
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, puppy face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh? "She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar... you know... there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, cutie pie?
.."LISTEN UP, D*CKHEAD! DRINK YOUR F**KING BEER IN YOUR GOD D*MN FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR MOTHER F**KING SNACKS, BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED NOW, YOU SELFISH BASTARD. YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT, A**HOLE?"
........and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?
So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said,"You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, ly pop...but at the bar...you know...they have frozen glasses..."
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, puppy face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh? "She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar... you know... there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, cutie pie?
.."LISTEN UP, D*CKHEAD! DRINK YOUR F**KING BEER IN YOUR GOD D*MN FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR MOTHER F**KING SNACKS, BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED NOW, YOU SELFISH BASTARD. YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT, A**HOLE?"
........and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Dear President "Pantywaist Gutzy Pants".......
You and your wife both complained and whined about how hard it is being present as Commander in Chief.
THIS is NOT considered to be working tirelessly and spending time away from your family.............
THIS IS:
although I do have a teenie tiny microscopically small bit of sympathy for you:
THIS is NOT considered to be working tirelessly and spending time away from your family.............
THIS IS:
although I do have a teenie tiny microscopically small bit of sympathy for you:
"DEATH" was preoccupied.........
This is a picture of whats left of my stepsons friends car.
He lives about an hour away and came up on tuesday night to visit us and his family. Jarod decided to spend the night at his mom's house and drive back to work in the morning. According to what I was told, he fell asleep ( no drugs or alcohol involved ) on the way back to work the next morning. The car went off the the highway and rolled over . Jarod was NOT wearing his seat belt and walked away with only bumps and bruises...
I think they should x-ray him to see if the horseshoe in his ass shifted position.
He lives about an hour away and came up on tuesday night to visit us and his family. Jarod decided to spend the night at his mom's house and drive back to work in the morning. According to what I was told, he fell asleep ( no drugs or alcohol involved ) on the way back to work the next morning. The car went off the the highway and rolled over . Jarod was NOT wearing his seat belt and walked away with only bumps and bruises...
I think they should x-ray him to see if the horseshoe in his ass shifted position.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
How's About a Little Steelers Wheel for a Wednesday?
IT seems they don't allow embedding now... so here is the LINK
Major Political Rumor.........
Rumor has it that Anthony Weiner is going to run for president.
He has chosen attorney general Eric Holder as his running mate.
"I found this in the comments here"
Thanks to commenter Blueburb for a funny comment!!
He has chosen attorney general Eric Holder as his running mate.
"I found this in the comments here"
Thanks to commenter Blueburb for a funny comment!!
TheOnesDay® *.... a twofer
Speaking of hand-written letters and signatures, I came upon this little gem:
(he needs to hang out more with Weiner)
(he needs to hang out more with Weiner)
"Destiny Who?" says the Unicorn Whisperer....
Well it looks like the "Skittle Shitting Unicorn" passed by Destiny Mathis's house......
.
Opening the handwritten letter from President Obama brought a glimmer of hope to her life as he promised her that things would get better for her and her family.
And despite the fact Destiny Mathis, from Hobart, Indiana, treasured the letter, more than two years later she has no choice but to sell it as she and her three children face eviction from their home.
The 26-year-old was an avid campaigner for Mr Obama in 2008, getting T-shirts made and encouraging people in her neighbourhood to vote.
She told him she was optimistic for change when she campaigned for him and that now she feels her future is bleak and unpromising. Despite this she also praised the President and his efforts.
"NOW she is on the verge of eviction"
"SHE's not the first either"
Opening the handwritten letter from President Obama brought a glimmer of hope to her life as he promised her that things would get better for her and her family.
And despite the fact Destiny Mathis, from Hobart, Indiana, treasured the letter, more than two years later she has no choice but to sell it as she and her three children face eviction from their home.
The 26-year-old was an avid campaigner for Mr Obama in 2008, getting T-shirts made and encouraging people in her neighbourhood to vote.
She told him she was optimistic for change when she campaigned for him and that now she feels her future is bleak and unpromising. Despite this she also praised the President and his efforts.
"NOW she is on the verge of eviction"
"SHE's not the first either"
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Monday, June 13, 2011
So I get this TXT message from a friend........
The Weiner Scandal has been going on for over a week. It's on the news and obviously making the rounds on the internet and social networking sites. You would have to be living under a rock to not know about it.
Anyway, I get a txt message today that says "is Weiner a Dem?". This is from a friend that watches the news, and reads some of the stuff I forward to him.
It just goes to show that it is barely mentioned what party affiliation Weiner is. I know DAMN well that had he been a Republican it would have been the first word in every news story, continuously being aired over and over.
Republican Weiner this and Republican Weiner that. Christ.. if he was a republican he would have already been kicked out....
The hypocrisy is so transparent.
Anyway, I get a txt message today that says "is Weiner a Dem?". This is from a friend that watches the news, and reads some of the stuff I forward to him.
It just goes to show that it is barely mentioned what party affiliation Weiner is. I know DAMN well that had he been a Republican it would have been the first word in every news story, continuously being aired over and over.
Republican Weiner this and Republican Weiner that. Christ.. if he was a republican he would have already been kicked out....
The hypocrisy is so transparent.
The Japanese Overcome Disaster......
Look what they have done after 3 months... can you imagine the red tape and Bullshit that would go on if it was this country???
Update.. COOP points out rhetorical side of my question in the comments:
"It did happen here, twice... See Ground Zero & New Orleans."
My hat is off to the determination that they show as a people.
Just three months ago Japan was plunged into chaos after a cataclysmic earthquake sent a merciless tsunami crashing through towns and cities up and down the east coast.
The unforgiving tide of water obliterated tens of thousands of buildings, devouring almost anything in its path. Thousands of people died and hundreds of bodies have never been recovered.
The heart-breaking images of families desperately searching for loved ones amid the rubble of their homes sent shockwaves around the world.
Now, three months on, these images show the Japanese people remain undaunted by the havoc nature has wreaked on their homeland as step by step they rebuild their nation.
"TSUNAMI AFTERMATH"
Update.. COOP points out rhetorical side of my question in the comments:
"It did happen here, twice... See Ground Zero & New Orleans."
My hat is off to the determination that they show as a people.
Just three months ago Japan was plunged into chaos after a cataclysmic earthquake sent a merciless tsunami crashing through towns and cities up and down the east coast.
The unforgiving tide of water obliterated tens of thousands of buildings, devouring almost anything in its path. Thousands of people died and hundreds of bodies have never been recovered.
The heart-breaking images of families desperately searching for loved ones amid the rubble of their homes sent shockwaves around the world.
Now, three months on, these images show the Japanese people remain undaunted by the havoc nature has wreaked on their homeland as step by step they rebuild their nation.
"TSUNAMI AFTERMATH"
Dear Abby......
Dear Abby,
My husband has a long record of money problems. He runs up huge
credit-card bills and at the end of the month, if I try to pay them off,
he shouts at me, saying I am stealing his money. He says pay the
minimum and lets our kids worry about the rest, but already we can
hardly keep up with the interest. Also he has been so arrogant and
abusive toward our neighbors that most of them no longer speak to us.
The few that do are an odd bunch, to whom he has been giving a lot of
expensive gifts, running up our bills even more. Also, he has gotten
religious. One week he hangs out with Catholics and the next with
people who say the Pope is the Anti-Christ, and the next he's with
Muslims.
Finally,
the last straw. He's demanding that before anyone can be in the same
room with him, they must
sign a loyalty oath. It's just so horribly creepy! Can
you help?
Signed, Lost in DC
---------------------------------------------------
Dear Lost:
Stop whining, Michelle. You're getting to live in the White House for
free, travel the world, and have others pay for everything for you. You
can divorce the jerk any time you want. The rest of us are stuck with
the S-O-B for two more years!
Signed, Abby
My husband has a long record of money problems. He runs up huge
credit-card bills and at the end of the month, if I try to pay them off,
he shouts at me, saying I am stealing his money. He says pay the
minimum and lets our kids worry about the rest, but already we can
hardly keep up with the interest. Also he has been so arrogant and
abusive toward our neighbors that most of them no longer speak to us.
The few that do are an odd bunch, to whom he has been giving a lot of
expensive gifts, running up our bills even more. Also, he has gotten
religious. One week he hangs out with Catholics and the next with
people who say the Pope is the Anti-Christ, and the next he's with
Muslims.
Finally,
the last straw. He's demanding that before anyone can be in the same
room with him, they must
sign a loyalty oath. It's just so horribly creepy! Can
you help?
Signed, Lost in DC
---------------------------------------------------
Dear Lost:
Stop whining, Michelle. You're getting to live in the White House for
free, travel the world, and have others pay for everything for you. You
can divorce the jerk any time you want. The rest of us are stuck with
the S-O-B for two more years!
Signed, Abby